The Sweet Stuff at the Bottom

Today I noticed an extra strong scent of citrus when I used my liquid shower soap. As I enjoyed the heightened smell, I wondered, 'why does it suddenly smell so strong?' It occurred to me that since the soap is almost gone, I must be smelling more fragrance because it has settled to the bottom.

A cliche ran through my head: Saving the best for last. Isn't this true of most things? The 'sweet stuff' is always at the bottom. Like the sugar at the bottom of a box of Rice Krispies. Or the syrup at the bottom of a Raspberry Lime Rickey. Just when you're tempted to be disappointed that it's almost gone, BAM, you get a rush of intense flavor.

I'm sure this wisdom can be applied to life. Endings can be so sad, disappointing, and stressful. But if we choose to see differently, we notice the hope at the bottom of a barrel. I'm reminded of a time when my husband lost his job. We were petrified as we had recently purchased a new home. Within months (which seemed like years at the time) my husband had secured the best job he'd had to that date; and in a field of work that suited him better!

I'll bet if we tried hard enough, we could see every ending as a gift. And if we tried really hard, we might even be able to enjoy the gift, reminding ourselves that when we think we've hit rock bottom, we simply need to open our eyes and be patient to find the sweetness that will energize us with a blast of hope. Hope comes in varying forms: a new job, clarity, self-awareness, freedom. Sometimes we can only see clearly when that which has consumed us is gone.

So if you, too, are facing an end - the end of the job, the end of the money, the end of a relationship, the end of your patience - remember, the best is waiting for you at the bottom.

All You Need Is Love

Is it okay to love yourself? Of course it is! Then why are we taught that self-love is synonymous with vanity and selfishness?

For example, religious leaders preach about the sin of pride. Parents chastise their children with warnings like ‘Who do you think you are’? Instead of loving ourselves, we learn to bully ourselves. Negative self-talk can plague us with thoughts of what we should be, should do, or should have, and we end up judging ourselves unworthy of our own affection. With harsh messages running through our heads, self-love is left cowering in the corner.

Self-criticism is only one way that we fail to love ourselves. Consider these other damaging practices: dishonoring your true feelings (i.e. saying 'yes' when you mean 'no'), cheating your body out of the rest it craves, or the food it needs, or adopting other's opinions of you. In these ways, we spend down our physical and emotional bank accounts and then collapse at the end of a day wondering why we have no energy. We generously give our love away to everyone but ourselves. A little self-love could fill us back up.
Try to complete this statement. “If I loved myself more, I would…….”

We deserve the best from ourselves. When we love ourselves, we are able to plunge into life with joy and meet the world with an unapologetic smile that declares, “I know who I am, and I like it.” We may be surprised when the world responds in kind.

So be generous to yourself.
Dare to love yourself more than others do.
Forgive yourself over and over again.
Choose a different response the next time you’re tempted to criticize yourself.

Loving yourself is your best chance at getting what you came for in this life. Our craziest desires tend to come true when we believe in our own worthiness. In the immortal words of

The Beatles:
“Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you in time – It’s easy. All you need is love.”